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My dad taught me a lot about money, but not all of his advice was useful. Here’s the advice I followed — and the advice I didn’t. 

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Like many people, I learned some money habits from my parents. I learned by watching what my parents did and deciding what behaviors I’d adopt and avoid. And, of course, I also got some actual financial advice as well.

Some of the financial advice my dad provided to me was great — but some other tips were a bit more questionable. Here is the best and worst financial advice my dad ever offered me, along with some insight into why some, but not all, of his advice is worth following.

Best advice: Marry someone whose money values match yours

The best financial advice my dad ever gave me was to marry someone with whom you are aligned on financial issues.

My parents agreed on a lot of things, but had some differences in terms of comfort with debt and saving versus spending for different purchases. Although they didn’t argue much, this was an occasional point of conflict. It also made it harder for them to work together to accomplish joint financial goals.

I have a lot of things I want to do in terms of how I manage my own money and I didn’t want to end up with a husband who made those things harder. So, I followed this advice. When I was dating anyone seriously, we always had conversations about how we would manage money together. And, my now-husband and I were on the same page from the start.

Since we’re aligned with our goals and values, we have never had any arguments about money and we’ve been married more than a decade. We agree completely on how to handle our joint checking account, investments, and debt, and it’s made building wealth — and making decisions together — a lot easier.

Worst advice: Don’t worry about borrowing as long as you can afford the monthly payment

The worst advice my dad ever gave me was that it was OK to borrow for purchases as long as I could afford the monthly payments.

He and my mom lived by this, putting stuff on credit cards sometimes, as well as financing purchases like furniture and cars. But this meant they ended up with regular monthly payments they had to make, which created financial stress and interfered with their ability to accomplish some of their financial goals.

Fortunately, I realized early on that this was bad advice — even though there’s quite a lot of pressure out there to focus on monthly payments from different lenders and retailers. Instead of only looking at the monthly costs when financing a purchase, I look at the total costs and decide if it’s worth spending that money. I also try to avoid borrowing for anything that doesn’t increase my net worth, as I’d rather just save up before making a purchase instead of getting stuck with monthly payments.

The good thing is, I have been able to evaluate all of the financial advice my parents gave me and make informed decisions about what tips to follow and avoid. Since many people end up adopting financial habits based on the way they grew up, it’s worth taking the time to really think about the money lessons your parents taught and deciding which ones make sense for you to follow.

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